Drama Queen
That’s me I’m referring to.
One minute I’m professing my love for someone, which is most likely just a lust thing. The next I’m realising how fucking stupid I am for ever believing anything could actually happen between us, bar the odd ‘encounter’. It’s a mutual enough attraction, but it’s just attraction, plain physical attraction.
Tonight I text him and he thought it was someone else and went all ‘flirty’ on me, then when he realised it was me, nothing, nada, zip. Not one more text. We’re supposed to be going out for brunch. He didn’t even get back to that topic.
And I realised, as I have realised many times before, then promptly forgotten, that he will NEVER ever give me what I need or want. never. It’s just not an option, it’s not in him, it’s not even by choice, he just doesn’t have whatever it is I’m talking about.
Today has been so emotionally exhausting, I’m going to go to sleep.
Essay still not done.
I feel ya on that. I want to swat myself for giving certain people the benefit of the doubt. Arg!
yet, we keep on doing it, even when deep down we know better…. why oh why?!
Comment by Reclusivegirl — August 27, 2006 @ 4:38 am
Well its good you realize that now. Too many times I knew that and still dated someone that was WRONG.
here ya on that! I stayed with my last ex WAY too long, I couldn’t stand the sight of him, he grossed me out. He wanted to get married and all that stuff, he didn’t even care that we never had sex and probably never would again! weirdo… least I won’t be making that mistake again, if I even get the chance! live and learn…
Comment by mary — August 27, 2006 @ 10:32 am